Moom

Thursday, October 31, 2013

To my little stargazer,
When I was pregnant, I thought and wrote a lot about all of the simple moments we would have together - sitting behind you while brushing your hair, your hand reaching for mine as we walked next to each other, kisses before bedtime, your feet on top of mine as we danced around the kitchen. I've been having moments with you lately when I realize if I had known what this would all be like, parenting and loving you, this moment would have gone on that list as well. Last night we pulled into the driveway around 9:30, an hour past your bedtime, and as Papa loosened your straps to pull you out of the car, you starting reciting 'moom, moom, moom. . .' and searching the sky. This is a regular occurrence these days, along with reading all the books we can find about the moon and pointing out the moon on every page of every book. 'Goodnight Moon' is especially on repeat. We've been wandering the yard in the darkness the past few nights, but we haven't been able to see the moon. I really couldn't explain to you why, because you wouldn't understand the technicalities, but also because  I don't understand the technicalities either, so I just told you we couldn't see her because she was hiding. (Little did I know, I was actually kind of correct.) To which you responded with a 'boo!' and a big smile. I keep having to tell you that night after night, and I'm sure soon enough that explanation won't be enough, so I'm hoping she will be out tonight. I had a lot of things that instilled wonder and awe in me as a child, one of them being firetrucks and the job of being a fireman (When asked what I wanted to be at my kindergarten graduation, I stood on the stage and proudly said, "I want to be a firefighter, just like my Daddy!"). I still feel a little rush of excitement in my soul when I pass a firetruck or stand across from a fire station. This seems to be your first 'great Joy,' as C.S. Lewis would say. You are too young to know what the moon is but you are captivated by it, no knowledge needed. The expression on your face when you see her is as if you're seeing a best friend. It's raw, pure joy evident by the sparkle in your eye and the kick of your legs. What I'm getting at is that there will be other things in life that mesmerize you just the same. Hold onto them. They're pointing to something greater than yourself, greater than this world. As I held you in my arms and stood in the middle of our street, eyes turned up to the sky, I heard you say 'star' for the first time. I realized you have brought on the biggest rush of wonder in my life and I hope it never ends.

All the Love in the Universe,
Mama

"If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy,
the most probably explanation is that we were made for another world."
C.S. Lewis

6 comments:

  1. What a sweet letter! Thanks for sharing!

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  2. I love that print from Taproot!!

    Riggs is obsessed with the moon too and it just thrills me. Every book that is about night time he searches for the moon. I just love his sensitive little soul that seems to be so in touch with the natural world and am so thankful he's in my life. Sounds like him and Evie would get along very well!

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    1. I think so too! If Alaska weren't so far away, I would have already invited you guys over for a playdate. ;)

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  3. Hi! Just catching up - stopping by from the Mom Lovin Hop and happy to be following along! I love this letter and the idea of encouraging wonder and awe in our children (and ourselves!). We have a quote on our daughter's nursery wall by E.B. White that says "Always be on the lookout for the presence of wonder" - something we definitely want to make sure she understands and lives by.

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    1. Glad you stopped by Nancy! I really love that quote! Thanks for sharing!

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